Oh lordy I have to return to work today. I feel like a third grader wanting to hold the thermometer under warm water and complain of a strange stomach ache. I have no idea where this aversion to work has come from. I have a feeling that once I sit down at my familiar desk, it will all go away. I'm thinking that I need to get a friend to call my cell phone around 9:30am with a fake emergency call, just in case I absolutely must get up and run away. Jeez, my job has become a blind date.
I may need to go into extreme simplicity mode, which is one foot in front of the other. I am simply afraid of everything. I remember about a year ago being on the 2nd step of a small step ladder I have had for years and for the first time, I knew better than to "jump" down. I had always jumped down, but I knew instinctively that the landing was going to be too jarring or just plain dangerous. I'm having that kind of feeling......it's just to jarring to jump into life and I don't wanna! Dammit.
7 comments:
it's always nice to have an escape plan.
Oh honey, I am sorry. Do you want me to call you at 9:30?
I'd call you in a shot Pam, let me know. Yup, I know that feeling about being on a small step ladder and not wanting to step down.
A big hug for you.
Pammie, it is good to have a back up plan. I can be one--just tell them you discovered a long lost relative in SC and you need to come for a visit. Or that you have to wash your cat (or Theo).
I'm pulling for you. I had many a day that I felt I could not stand another staff meeting or director's meeting. I wanted to run. Eventually, I got to do just that in retirement.
This Too Shall Pass.
It always does.
Oh Pammie...I am sad for you today. ((HUG))
I so know that feeling . . I like how you put it. Where on earth does it suddenly come from?
I got it today . . . "Out of the blue" all the stuff that I've been planning/dealing with like a normal grown up all seems very frightening, daunting.
Like, what was I thinking making dental appointments etc? Where's that woman from yesterday? Come back . . . quick!
I'm glad it's not just me but I really hope it passes soon.
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