Monday, May 7, 2012

Monday Morning

I'm not able to comment on your blogs this morning (?)  I'm not sure if this will publish either. 

I think I am having plain old age, maybe hormone issues.  I wish Mother were around so I could ask her.

I had my four day vacation but it's over.  I read two books, took 3 naps, swam for hours, potted a dozen new plants but it's over.  My husband says that another weekend is right around the corner but it's a long damn block.  I don't know why I don't want to leave home.  I don't know why the thought of going into work this morning is weighing on me like a brick.  I just don't know why.

I did not answer my phone for four damn days.  That's craziness. Well, if it had been my children, I would have.

It "feels" like the only place that drama can not come into my life is in the back yard.  I used to hate drama but now I fear it.  I don't feel competent to solve anything for anyone.  If you created it, then you fix it.

I see my grandma's face when I look in the mirror.  I loved my grandma but I don't really want her face, ya know?  That doesn't really bother me but I thought I'd throw it in as a fact of how things are right now.

It's kind of like a pity party only without the sad part, just the confused...what the hell?....part.

I'm not sure what would be happening right now if I did not have God to turn to or if I was drunk....yuck, it would really be awful.

I think it's an "aging" thing......Mama would know.

15 comments:

Mary Christine said...

Your mama would know. But I bet you do too. You are a wise woman.

Lou said...

what Mary said.

XOXO

Mary LA said...

What Mary Christine said.

I look at my hands and they look old and as if they belong to my grandmother. Why are my damn hands ageing so fast?

I dread dramas too. I used to create them like glorious shit storms.

Take care Pam, you are precious.

Annette said...

((HUG)) Around here we all love being home the best too.

dAAve said...

What Mary Christine, Lou, Mary LA and Annette said.

SoberMomRocks said...

I look in the mirror and see my mom...if you knew my mom you'd know why that is not a good thing.

At least you love your grandma...even if it is hard to see her face on yours.

(((Hugs)))

Her Big Sad said...

I see my Nana when I look in the mirror. Since she is my dearest grandmother and I miss her more each day.... I'm okay with that. We really are similar, and not just the faces... I've got her physique (including the batwing deformity, or flying squirrel deformity, as the plastic surgeons nickname heavy arms!), but I'm working on getting healthier, so that's okay too. But yeah, sometimes I marvel at that woman in the mirror....

My oldest daughter can't understand why I am a homebody now. I don't even want to go to an Elton John concert, which would be the equivalent of our dear Barbara passing up a chance to see her beloved Bruce. Home is my favorite place. And it is generally drama free, as I grow my "using the tools" habit. I get tripped up by myself now and then, but I guess that's part of the process/progress! :)

I pray for you every day Pammie, even though I don't comment much. This week I will pray that your week is smooth and swift, and that the work weight lightens on your shoulders daily, and you round that corner to a glorious weekend!! (Hug!)

Patty said...

Lovin you from afar, Pam. <3

Jess Mistress of Mischief said...

I can remember the first time I looked down and saw my mothers hands... I called her IMMEDIATELY and she laughed and laughed. She was also amazed that I remembered her hands so well. Now I see the photos and I look more and more like my mom.

I always said (and still hold to it) that I don't care if I get wrinkles as long as they're laugh lines.

SO DAMN IT DANCE MONKEYS SO I CAN LAUGH MORE!

I've had the same problem over the last few days, I have to PUSH to work each day and I'm freakin' exhausted. I think anyone who is taking care of another human being full time and trying to work as well would though. Not to mention the calls to insurance companies and dealing with normal life stuff like laundry and dishes.

:D Good thing we have God, it sure is!

(((((((HUGS)))))))))

Syd said...

Pammie, there comes a point in life when I just got tired of the same old routine, the same old BS, the same old meetings. It took the joy out of my career. I was done. I'm glad that I made it for so long. But as I get older, I see that maybe I have 30 good years left, if I am lucky. I want to use them wisely.
I know that you will figure out a way to get the energy back. This is just life. And we have to roll with it.

قمم التميز said...

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شركة تنظيف منازل بالدمام
شركة تنظيف بيوت بالدمام
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شركة تنظيف بالخبر
شركة تنظيف منازل بالخبر
شركة تنظيف بيوت بالخبر
شركة تنظيف فلل بالخبر
شركة تنظيف شقق بالخبر
شركة تنظيف خزانات بالخبر
شركة جلى بلاط بالخبر
شركة مكافحة حشرات بالدمام
شركة كشف تسربات المياه بالدمام
شركة مكافحة حشرات بالخبر
شركة كشف تسربات المياه بالخبر


قمم تميز said...

شركة المثالية للتنظيف
شركة المثالية للتنظيف بالدمام
شركة المثالية للتنظيف بالخبر
المثالية للتنظيف
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شركة المثالية لتنظيف الفلل بالدمام
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شركة المثالية لتنظيف الفلل بالجبيل
شركة المثالية لتنظيف الفلل بالقطيف

قمم تميز said...

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شركة المثالية لتنظيف الشقق بالدمام
شركة المثالية لتنظيف الشقق بالخبر
شركة المثالية لتنظيف الشقق بالجبيل
شركة المثالية لتنظيف الشقق بالقطيف
شركة المثالية لتنظيف المنازل بالدمام
شركة المثالية لتنظيف المنازل بالخبر
شركة المثالية لتنظيف المنازل بالجبيل
شركة المثالية لتنظيف المنازل بالقطيف
المثالية لتنظيف المنازل
رقم المثالية للتنظيف

قمم تميز said...

رقم المثالية لتنظيف المنازل
شركة المثالية للنظافة
شركة المثالية لمكافحة الحشرات بالدمام
شركة المثالية لمكافحة الحشرات بالخبر
شركة المثالية لمكافحة الحشرات بالجبيل
شركة المثالية لمكافحة الحشرات بالقطيف
شركة المثالية لمكافحة النمل الابيض بالدمام
شركة المثالية لمكافحة النمل الابيض بالخبر
شركة المثالية لمكافحة النمل الابيض بالجبيل

قمم تميز said...

شركة المثالية لمكافحة النمل الابيض بالقطيف
شركة المثالية لمكافحة النمل الابيض
المثالية لمكافحة النمل الابيض
المثالية لمكافحة الحشرات
شركة مكافحة الحمام بالدمام
شركة مكافحة الحمام بالخبر
شركة مكافحة الحمام بالجبيل
شركة مكافحة الحمام بالقطيف
شركة ترميم فلل منازل بالدمام
شركة ترميم منازل فلل بالخبر