Friday, December 2, 2011

Just yak yak

I had to give myself a good talkin' to yesterday, trying to reign in my emotions.  I'm trying to move some stuff from one computer to a new one at work and I swear I had to go into the bathroom to cry for a few minutes.  It was frustration type tears or the feeling stupid type tears or something I don't know, but I had to tell myself "listen here missy - get a grip."  Today, I will ask for help.

A coworker told me that her mother is coming to Houston for chemo this month.  If I get cancer at age 84, I just don't think I would want to get chemo.....I don't know why that sounds crazy to me, maybe because I'm not 84 and so I don't know how that feels.

My body is so tired lately.  I have made a goal to walk one mile every day and although to a lot of you out there, that sounds like nothing, to me it is.  I started on Wednesday and I am already feeling a little better for it or at least for the decision.

I don't understand the word homophobic.  I think it's used wrong.

This week I said submarine when I meant silverware.  I said birch tree when I meant tree branch.  I've diagnosed an inoperable brain tumor in myself.

OK. goodbye.  Stay in Friday because it could quite possibly be the perfect day.


Mary Christine said...

Waking is good for the body and the soul. Getting outdoors is magical. Good for you!

And word-finding problems are getting worse with me all the time. And people's name-finding problems too.

Syd said...

I have been at peace with emotional stuff the last couple of days. It has been a welcome respite from the sadness. When my mind gets overloaded, I mix up words. I may have used up a lot of storage on my hard drive. Time to defrag and reboot.

ScottF said...

Walking helps me sort, and it is good for the bod, you go girl!

I can relate to so much of what you've shared here... Please keep being honest and stay in the day (oh, and keeep sharing it with us!)

dAAve said...

Inoperable? Probably not.

Annette said...

I do that all the time and I swear I have Alzheimer's. Maybe its because those are the types of people I hang out with the most!

I would not get chemo at 84 either. Although I do hope to live to be a walking, talking, remembering at least some real things, maybe not driving, 100 year old.

Marcia said...

Laughed out loud at your self diagnosis! I don't know how I'll feel at 84. Thanks for mentioning me yesterday, btw.

Lou said...

Walking..I don't have time, nor enough space in this box to plead with you to keep walking one mile a day. It is the #1 favor you can do for yourself. To stay motivated:

get an Ipod- Rock out or listen to speaker tapes

take the dog

do your 11th step for the day

carry a picture of the new bathing suit you will wear in the pool next summer, as the neighbor lady stares enviously

It takes 6 weeks to make something a habit. C'mon, you know how to make a habit;)

Anonymous said...

I have joined you in your goal. I feel so blah lately. I made a decision and started walking the steep hills in my neighborhood with the dog and will be buying a bike tomorrow and will, hopefully, be cycling to work more.

Pammie said...

LOL Lou,
One, I want to scream at women who walk with ipods...I think it makes you a target for a crime or just a car running into you because you can't hear what's coming up.
Two, my dog can not walk that far any more, his bones are too old.
Three, I wish I had body ego stuff to help, but I just don't. a habit? no, I've never had any habits.

Mary LA said...

Love walking outdoors. I also do my ungraceful t'ai chi exercises to keep the body from crumbling and falling apart. Hugs to Theo.

Barbara said...

I started walking recently too, a half hour on my lunch break and am trying to do it on my days off...but...doesn't always happen.

I understand computer frustration tears, I hope you got it all handled. I have had hundreds of self diagnosed brain tumors over the year and every type of cancer and rare disease you can think of. Sigh. Good thing I'm not a doctor.

Love your saying you have up. I will not watch romantic movies. I just can't, they always make me feel so depressed. I prefer dark psychological thrillers (very few friends will go to the movies with me but I don't mind going alone).

Sorry - this was all about me. I hope your weekend was better than your Friday. Keep walking! It really does make a difference!!!