Saturday, August 13, 2011

Aren't We All

  • Went to doctor, EKG, nitro pills, referral to cardiologist....am being resistant for some reason.
  • Picked up cigarettes.  Have committed to myself to buy AND read the book that Dave and Scott have been recommending to me year after year after year.
  • Lots of pain amongst our non alcoholic, non addict bloggers these days concerning, helping, enabling, loving, letting go etc.  My advice if you are interested is:  It really doesn't matter sweet precious normies......do what you are comfortable with.  Spend all your money trying to help or spend none of your money.  Take their calls or don't take their calls.  Pay for them an apartment or give them your home.  Dis-own them or clutch them tight.  All your pain is about you....saying this with love.  Your fear of wanting them to be healthy and happy and sane.  Since none of this is within your power to give them, then do what makes you able to sleep at night, do what makes life bearable for you.  Your addict/alcoholic is doing what makes life bearable for them......aren't we all? 
  • I'm not trying be simplistic about such a huge issue, I just wanted to put that brief statement out there. 

9 comments:

Lou said...

Can I use your advice as my "mission statement"?

Syd said...

And that brief statement says it all. Don't resist the visit to the cardiologist.....please, Pammie.

Mary Christine said...

Pammie, thanks for updating. I have been worrying about you.

And thanks for the advice. I am grateful I was an alcoholic in recovery when my daughter was "out there." I think it helped me immensely. Because I know that people are done when they are done and there is nothing you can do to hasten that process... and anyone who tells you you can probably is selling a book or a rehab stint.

Anonymous said...

I guess we and they "Have to Float our/their Own Boat"...Persevere and Hang On Tight.

dAAve said...

Cheers mate!

Gabriella Moonlight said...

This is a brilliant post, and so true. I could do nothing for my mother, she died, she did drugs, she drank, she died, there was nothing I could do or say or be that would change her, helplessness, YES, Powerless, Yes...but not enabling.

I am glad that you are going to the doctor to take care of you!!! This is so important to so many! You are important to so many!

I hope that it goes well, pray and pray again to just let go of the resistance, it will move through...

I quit smoking a few years ago, very hard, but today I am very happy that I did...

xo

Todd HellsKitchen said...

Dave + Scott = Wisdom

louisey said...

So true, Pam. Love to you and take care.

scottf said...

after reading your last few posts, I'll be praying for you Pammie :-)